You say paranoid...I say smart.

Watch the news. Read a blog. Log in to Facebook. Talk to a friend. Tragic stories are all around us. This is nothing new, of course. We simply have access to more people now than ever before and we hear heartbreaking tales of children being killed or injured in preventable accidents, children being taken from their parents and never seen again or found dead hours, days, or weeks later. We are constantly reminded of some of the basic rules of parenting. We are reminded of the horrific things that can happen when good parents turn their backs on what they know for 30 seconds, or a minute, or five. We suddenly feel connected to these parents who are grieving. We feel incredible sympathy for them, but at the same time we are so incredibly grateful that it didn't happen to us. We hug our children tighter, shed tear, vow to do better, then move on with our lives. We might change our habits for a day, a week, or month, but then somehow we end up making exceptions to our rules. The rules that keep our children safe and alive.

What are these rules? Some of them are:
NEVER:
leave your child in the bath.
leave your child in the car.
lose sight of your child in ANY public place. This includes your own front yard.
allow your child to ride in a car without being properly buckled into an appropriate child seat.

Of course there are more, but these are a few that have been in the news recently. These are not rules that make us exceptional parents, just smart parents. Following these will prevent some of the preventable accidents that occur and will save lives. Of course there are so many things that can happen that cannot be foreseen. We just have to do our best every day.

I break a lot of rules. I'm not a perfect parent. I try each day to do a little better than yesterday. But, I don't break THESE rules. EVER. For ANY reason. These are the unbreakable, unbendable rules that I live by every day, without fail. When I hear stories of people losing their children to tub drowning, kidnapped from a park, suffocation in a car, minor car wreck that results in death to a child not in a seatbelt/carseat, I feel all the same feelings that any other parent does. I feel such great sympathy for the family, I feel heartbroken for the parents. The only thing that is different is the lesson learned. Instead of the incident being an example of what I need to do better, I am simply reassured that what I'm doing is the right thing to do. Is it always convenient? No. Is it always fun? No. Not for me or my children at times. Do my children feel a little deprived sometimes? Sure. Have I ever regretted it? Not a chance. I know it's right. I know it's the only right way for me. And yet, I am labeled as paranoid and over-protective. I've even given these labels to myself on occasion to justify my actions and to get away from peer pressure.

I'm turning over a new leaf. I will not be giving myself a negative label anymore. I will not allow others to make me feel guilty about living according to the rules that I believe so strongly in. I will continue to listen to the voices in my head that motivate me to never, ever, make an exception. When I see others breaking these rules, I will continue to say a little prayer that they will not be numbered among the many who learn the hard way.

I pray every night that my family will be safe. And every day when I wake up, I do the work that it takes to keep us safe from the things we have control over. I have to have faith that whatever else happens, happens for a reason, and is part of God's plan for us. That's the hard part. The rest is just instinct at this point.

So, parents, please don't be a blog story or a segment on the news. Don't wait until these tragedies hit so close to home that you cannot ignore them any more. Please don't wait until you lose a child. How many times do you hear "This is surreal. I hear these stories, but I never thought it would be my story", "I never do that, it's so unlike me, but I made an exception. Just once."

If you break a rule, maybe nothing bad will happen....but maybe it will. That part you have no control over. Is it worth the risk? Is there anything in this world that is a higher priority than your children. That milk you ran into the store to get would not seem so important any more if you came out and your kids were gone. That five minutes you save by not buckling your kids in, turns into an eternity when you get rear-ended and lose one of them. That chat at the park with a friend is not so needed anymore when you turn around and can't find your child. How long was your child in the tub? It didn't feel like very long, when you were on the computer or phone.

Don't be a story, be an example.

Soccer Season!

Sam's first soccer game of the season went just like the last season....snow. We snapped a few pictures before the clouds rolled in...in a matter of 2 minutes or so and started dumping freezing, slushy snow on us. He had so much fun though and his team scored 8 goals! He LOVES being part of a team and interacting with other kids. He likes to let them all run ahead of him for some reason though. He loves being part of the competition but he isn't super competitive. I love it. He's so funny when he cheers for his team mates when he's on the sidelines and he's constantly giving praise when he's playing. Any time another player falls down, which is often, he always stops to check on them before moving on. What a kid!

April Showers?

We took the opportunity to play in the snow for the (hopefully) last time this winter. The boys loved building a "Zombie Snowman"(according to Sam) and it pretty much turned into an all out attack on mommy with a snowball fight. How does Joe get them on his side so easily? It was fun and they were such good sports when I got them back:) The snow had all melted before this 5 or 6 inches fell so it was all great snow and it melted the next day..an added bonus. We welcome spring now that we've had all our winter fun!

Change is Good

I love change. I crave it. I'm ready for spring, summer, anything but winter. I want to go on a road trip. I would LOVE to go all by myself...but do I have to end up somewhere? Can't I just drive and drive, stop when I want to stop, go when and where I want to go. I love being disconnected from the world and everyone in it. Don't get me wrong, I adore my family. Sometimes I still crave alone time though. All growing up, with 8 brothers and sisters and 2 very prying and paranoid parents, I never spent much time alone. I took every opportunity I could to find a quiet spot away from everyone to just....do nothing. I think this is why I don't want a cell phone. I don't like the idea of somebody always knowing where I am and what I'm doing. I don't like feeling like I have to answer or return calls. I'll take the risk of needing one and not having it...I haven't encountered that in my 29 years so far. I'm just fine to walk down the road if I need help. I'm not afraid of changing a tire (I'd feel pretty stupid calling my husband to come change it for me anyway). I think that most of us reach for the phone to call someone else any time we encounter a problem. Is that just making our lives easier or is it making us less and less capable of solving even the smallest issues by ourselves? What will we do when our phone is out of range or the battery dies? Will that alone prevent us from say...going on a hike, a drive, or taking time for ourselves when we want or need to?

Sometimes I see people become a completely dependent individual when they get married. I guess if you are with someone 24/7 it's easy to depend on them for everything. We tend to lose ourselves I think. I love that my husband is a different person from me. Of course we have found things that we have in common and find new things that we both love, but he hasn't changed who he is on account of who I am. We knew who we were before we met(although we have grown up a lot since then!) and that's who we fell in love with. The he and I who exsisted before we met still exsist. I love that he has hobbies, relationships, inside jokes, and a personality that I am no part of. I love that he and I have different friends, and some of the same. After all, we are different people and need and want different things from a friendship. I love that he doesn't need me to tell him my opinion on something before deciding how he feels about it himself. I love that every day we get to have real discussions. Just as if it were on a first date. We ask and listen and learn things about each other that we could not assume to know. There was a time when I wondered what we would do when we are 80 and still had nothing in common. I laugh at that now because it makes me so excited to get to know him all over again with every passing day. How could we ever get bored? I love that we are both passionate...about different things. I love how he supports and encourages mine without pretending that it's a passion or even interest of his own. I try my best to do the same for him. I love, love, love this man. I love that he knows who I am and loves me anyway. I love that he doesn't require or expect anything from me in order to gain or keep his love. I love who he is with me and all we have together, but most of all I love him for who he is independently of me. This month we will celebrate our 9th anniversary. We've had lots of fun, but as I see with every new day that comes our way, the best is always yet to come!

It's a......

GIRL!!! Wow. I keep having to erase "boy" and type "girl". I'm in shock..and SO excited. I already have a list of things to make before she gets here July 6th (yes, the c-section is already scheduled!). I know time will move faster than I plan on. If anyone has some dress patterns I'd love to borrow them so that I can make some little dresses for her. I have never bought a stitch of anything girly so we are starting completely from scratch with this one. A little scary and really exciting too! I could spend all day (and a fortune) on Etsy picking out things for her. This could be bad;) Sam is absolutely ecstatic that he's getting a little sister! He has already told me that I'm the best mom in the world. When I said why?, he said "because you borned a baby sister".It's so adorable to have him looking over my shoulder at little girl stuff and saying (about EVERY item) "OOOH, it's SO cute!!" What a little sweetheart he is. I'm glad that Jack gets to stay my baby boy for at least a while longer(who knows). I wasn't quite ready to have him graduate from that role just yet. What a perfect little man he is! Anyway, here are some pictures we got at the ultrasound.

#3 is on it's way!

Hey everyone. I'm lame and don't update my blog. That doesn't mean that we haven't been doing lots of fun things and have lots of news to share. We are expecting #3!! Most of you likely know this already;) We will get to find out on Feb. 23 what we are having. Sam says "NO MORE BROTHERS"! I don't think Jack really cares. Maybe we'll get a girl this time or maybe we'll get another adorable, exciting, perfect little boy! We're excited either way to add to our family.
We had a great year in 2009 full of lots of fun and family stuff. I got to go to my 10 year High School reunion in July while Joe stayed home with the boys and did "boy stuff" aka video games. We can't wait for summer so that we can get out of the house and up the canyon again. We love going for walks and drives and letting the boys explore and throw rocks in the river. I LOVE these ages.
Sam started Kindergarten and loves it. I cannot believe how fast he is learning to read! He has always amazed me and hasn't stopped. I love hearing all the stories of his little friends at school and how much he likes his teacher. He is turning 6 in a couple weeks and is so excited (of course) for his birthday. We bribed him out of a big friend party this year and promised: ice skating, skiing, family party, school party, and chuck e. cheese. That's how excited I was to do another friend party this year! He already did his ice skating and was, of course, SO good at it. Seriously, if I could have half of this kids abilities (when he decided he wants to do something), I'd be the most successful everything in the world!
Jack and his bravery are scary. He went sledding for the first time in his life and insisted on doing it himself! Adorable, even though I had to turn my head out of fear:) Let's just say he's not afraid of much. I've tried telling him things are "dangerous" but that too backfired. He apparently associated it with fun things and as he was running across a bridge on a playset one day we heard him saying "WWEEEEE, Dangerous!" Does it get much cuter?
Joe's dad got a great job in New York and they will be moving this month. We are so excited for them to have this new adventure even though we will miss them a lot! We've never really planned on staying in Utah forever so that makes the decision even easier! We don't have immediate plans to move but plans will come;)
We are so excited to see what 2010 brings. It will for sure bring us a new little one to love and it doesn't get much better than that! I hope that the year will bring all of you excitement, joy, and fulfillment of every kind.