You say paranoid...I say smart.

Watch the news. Read a blog. Log in to Facebook. Talk to a friend. Tragic stories are all around us. This is nothing new, of course. We simply have access to more people now than ever before and we hear heartbreaking tales of children being killed or injured in preventable accidents, children being taken from their parents and never seen again or found dead hours, days, or weeks later. We are constantly reminded of some of the basic rules of parenting. We are reminded of the horrific things that can happen when good parents turn their backs on what they know for 30 seconds, or a minute, or five. We suddenly feel connected to these parents who are grieving. We feel incredible sympathy for them, but at the same time we are so incredibly grateful that it didn't happen to us. We hug our children tighter, shed tear, vow to do better, then move on with our lives. We might change our habits for a day, a week, or month, but then somehow we end up making exceptions to our rules. The rules that keep our children safe and alive.

What are these rules? Some of them are:
NEVER:
leave your child in the bath.
leave your child in the car.
lose sight of your child in ANY public place. This includes your own front yard.
allow your child to ride in a car without being properly buckled into an appropriate child seat.

Of course there are more, but these are a few that have been in the news recently. These are not rules that make us exceptional parents, just smart parents. Following these will prevent some of the preventable accidents that occur and will save lives. Of course there are so many things that can happen that cannot be foreseen. We just have to do our best every day.

I break a lot of rules. I'm not a perfect parent. I try each day to do a little better than yesterday. But, I don't break THESE rules. EVER. For ANY reason. These are the unbreakable, unbendable rules that I live by every day, without fail. When I hear stories of people losing their children to tub drowning, kidnapped from a park, suffocation in a car, minor car wreck that results in death to a child not in a seatbelt/carseat, I feel all the same feelings that any other parent does. I feel such great sympathy for the family, I feel heartbroken for the parents. The only thing that is different is the lesson learned. Instead of the incident being an example of what I need to do better, I am simply reassured that what I'm doing is the right thing to do. Is it always convenient? No. Is it always fun? No. Not for me or my children at times. Do my children feel a little deprived sometimes? Sure. Have I ever regretted it? Not a chance. I know it's right. I know it's the only right way for me. And yet, I am labeled as paranoid and over-protective. I've even given these labels to myself on occasion to justify my actions and to get away from peer pressure.

I'm turning over a new leaf. I will not be giving myself a negative label anymore. I will not allow others to make me feel guilty about living according to the rules that I believe so strongly in. I will continue to listen to the voices in my head that motivate me to never, ever, make an exception. When I see others breaking these rules, I will continue to say a little prayer that they will not be numbered among the many who learn the hard way.

I pray every night that my family will be safe. And every day when I wake up, I do the work that it takes to keep us safe from the things we have control over. I have to have faith that whatever else happens, happens for a reason, and is part of God's plan for us. That's the hard part. The rest is just instinct at this point.

So, parents, please don't be a blog story or a segment on the news. Don't wait until these tragedies hit so close to home that you cannot ignore them any more. Please don't wait until you lose a child. How many times do you hear "This is surreal. I hear these stories, but I never thought it would be my story", "I never do that, it's so unlike me, but I made an exception. Just once."

If you break a rule, maybe nothing bad will happen....but maybe it will. That part you have no control over. Is it worth the risk? Is there anything in this world that is a higher priority than your children. That milk you ran into the store to get would not seem so important any more if you came out and your kids were gone. That five minutes you save by not buckling your kids in, turns into an eternity when you get rear-ended and lose one of them. That chat at the park with a friend is not so needed anymore when you turn around and can't find your child. How long was your child in the tub? It didn't feel like very long, when you were on the computer or phone.

Don't be a story, be an example.